They're at it again!

I'm right back where it all started. My mother has decided that it's time for me to settle down and find myself a good, loving, intelligent boy from a well-respected family, from the same caste as me. If you're an Indian woman in her mid-late 20's, you'll know what I'm talking about!

No matter how forward thinking our parents claim to be, when it comes to marriage, most of them succumb to the pressures of the society and take to matrimonial sites for finding that perfect match for their children. They hear stories of people who've found bliss on the internet. This is like Tinder… only that mostly it’s the parents who’re swiping away to the perfect match.

Now, I personally have nothing against people finding love online. I have absolutely no bones to pick with anyone who feels it best to let someone else do the choosing of what could be one of the most important choices of their lives! Heck… I did that! I let someone else take the reins of my life and let me tell you, the ride was as bumpy as it gets. And I learnt valuable life lessons at the end of it.

So you may wonder just what I've been smoking to be doing this again?! I mean, wise people learn from their mistakes, right? Well, let’s not be getting our panties in a twist, people!

I know I sound like a hypocrite. But if I were to stay out of this, things only get worse. It happened once. I didn't give a damn and before I knew it, I was married to a motherfucker who liked dicks more than I did! But, hear me out, dear reader. When I say I give a damn, I don’t mean that I visualize myself getting married to the men who seem interested in the warped image my mother has projected of me on that god-awful site! Heck, I wouldn't marry the girl my mom’s made me out to be! But today, chancing upon the gazillion mails from interested suitors brought a few things to light. And those things are worth sharing.

Matrimony is all about the moolah these days!

Forget love; forget emotional compatibility and all the applesauce they say is important! The one thing you’re supposed to look at is his pay package! That’s right! As long as he earns enough, who the hell cares if he’s a closet psychopath with temper issues?

People will strut their stuff like there’s no tomorrow. 

More than one profile that my mother thrust into my face had the guy smirking away at the camera like he was George Clooney’s long lost nephew! And the thing is, they weren't even good looking to begin with! Yes, I know I’m being a jerk. But, when some guy claims to be fair and would prefer women who’re fairer, I have a problem. Without a photo uploaded to substantiate my mother’s claims that I was fair in complexion, I’m also buried neck deep with requests for a photo, which brings me to the next point.

If some of the people on matrimonial sites were actually serious, they’d be charged with felony!

There was one request from a guy who was married and had decided he wouldn't get a divorce. But hey, he wants another understanding and loving girl who was willing to live with him and his first wife… all as one big happy family. He doesn't have a job, his wife’s a house wife and so, he would like someone who earns a living and “is willing to believe in him that his business endeavours would succeed someday, somehow”. I don’t think I need to say anything further there!

I could go on and on, but I don’t see the point. It’s a little sad that what should be an organic, natural and almost an intangible transition into what is the most beautiful connection between hearts has to be so structured… so forced… so compartmentalized into categories. I don’t think I can ever fall for this. But then again, that does not seem to stop my mother from wasting her time on the site. Oh well, to each their own, I guess!