So.... out of place!

Have you ever had the feeling of suddenly, quite abruptly feeling out of place of sorts when you're in the midst of friends? I mean, one moment... you're all friendly and then suddenly, you get these vibes that maybe.... just maybe they're not that very into the entire "friendship with you" aspect.

Hmmm.... right now, I seem to be getting those sort of vibes from a few of my friends. It's kinda sad this way. Because, right now, I feel the loneliest I've ever been and for some reason, these few friends were the ones in whom I'm confided most of my secrets and apprehensions. Maybe that is why they inch away.... then I am to blame, ne? LOL... If you think you belong to this category, then I am very very sorry for having burdened you with my problems! :)

All in all.... right now is a very difficult time for me... but that's okay! I'll get through that all by myself, thank you! :)

Puppies are just like kids sometimes!

When they said that having a puppy is akin to having kids, they weren't kidding! Darling little Tsuyoshi is as energetic and endearing as a human tot and just as mischievous! He seems to have a special attachment to my toes and lunges at them for a nibble whenever he gets the chance! And right now, he's teaching me valuable lessons in parenting! Phew, I never ever thought I'd say this... but it's such fun minding after him! ;)

And right now, he's on time out, thanks to having brought in a dead "something"! It looked like fish but the smell seems to suggest something more sinister! The baka was happy biting into it and the moment he spotted Dad and me, he tried taking off with the weird piece of meat. It was hilarious seeing that tiny tyke trying to climb through the grill in the gate and when caught, looked at us with such doleful eyes, as though he seemed to suggest "would this cute face ever do anything wrong?"

But I did manage to resist his charms long enough to tell him off pretty sternly and surprise! surprise! He seems to understand the underlying intent of my words pretty clearly! And the meat was giving him a slight tummy ache. I managed to give him some water and he's feeling much better.... "back to nibbling my toes" better! But fighting those huge puppy dog eyes is beginning to get difficult. But I'll manage! ;)

And now, news from the other side!

Am I the only person who seems to think it really weird calling pets one's personal property? I mean, here's this guy who sets his puppy on fire, beats it and leaves it for dead and all he gets is a slap on the wrist and that too for setting personal property on fire! I mean.... come on! That's a live creature we're talking about! What of the dignity and rights that a living being is deigned to possess? What of the liability of taking something as precious and irreplaceable as a life? Don't any of those things matter anymore? Well... on the plus side, the Law in North Carolina has been made a bit more stringent. But even then, shouldn't animals be more than just personal property?

Hmmph! Like people give a damn anyway, right?

In other news, one of my cousins has gotten through JNCASR's Integrated PhD programmes for Microbiology and this was all that took to have my mother tell me how much of a failure I shall be, having gotten through nowhere. She seems to feel for not having gone for a second child now. Something about the second one doing everything I didn't. Yeah, it hurt. But like that matters anymore! And so, I hope you guys have an awesome weekend as I spend mine in obscurity within my own house! D: Right now, Tsuyoshi and Tsume happen to be the only people who seem happy seeing me around. There, I said people.... not property! :D

Hmmmmmm.....

Isn't it the sweetest thing to wake up in the morning and to be greeted by the wagging of two tails and four eyes looking up at you with so much love? I think I'm finally in love.... truly in love! :)

Cheers to you, my friend!

One of my friends has gotten placed in a really good university (better than mine! :D) for his PhD. I'd like to wish him all the very best and hopefully win a Nobel! :)

Oh, and as for me, I'm still hunting for something good... Maybe certain things are not for me... I am not hoping for anything right now... it's eerily fun standing in the way of a train that's thundering towards you. Your brain tells you to scoot but your legs refuse to move and your heart in the middle, does the flamenco!

Words of Gratitude

It has been quite the dismal week here. Many of my woes center around a thesis I was trying so hard to finish by the end of last week! And now, after having given it away, I feel so much lighter! It's now time to sit and confront most of the issues I'd swept under the bed! And I'm going to give it my best shot!

What's with the sudden enthusiasm, you ask? Well... that's what some good words of encouragement can do to you. This post is dedicated to that anonymous person who'd written a few well meaning words of courage in the comments to my previous post! Thank you! I might know you... or maybe not. But to know that I've had this sort of an impact on at least one person out there, it gives me hope! I'm going to give my best in all that I do henceforth! :D And if you're reading this, as I hope you are, I'm glad to have known you (if we have spoken before).

.................

It's almost like I'm beginning to reconsider a lot of things in life. Am I really good enough for most of my dreams? Should I just give up? Would anyone give a damn?

I'm sure most of the ones who know me wouldn't. This sucks... stuck in the bottom with no way up!