Saturday, October 3, 2009

*The author is laughing her butt off and so cannot insert a Title right now.. so, insert your own title here!*

It has been quite a week here... what with Lab and a nut for a professor... it was at the least amusing at times but mostly irritating!

We have Dr. Kappochino (pun heavily intended!) who is in charge of Lab sessions for the Second year Masters students (that means us). And we are slowly beginning to wonder and gape with astonishment as to how in the name of the "Holy Plunger that the Great Balooga uses", she got her PhD.!

I mean.... come on! It doesn't take an IQ of 140 to figure that the metal Copper will not melt at 110°C! I mean... if it did, we wouldn't be seeing so many metal furnaces around.... would we? Of course, the melting point changes with variation in the atmospheric pressure, but in a normal environment where the butt of your experiment is open to the elements, I guess it is relatively safe you won't end up with copper goo when you heat it up to 110°C!

And for some reason, I think she hates me from the core of her rotten and black organ that in no way resembles a heart! And this particular hypothesis is strongly supported by evidences where she refuses to sign my lab observations stating I was absent for one friggin' class! Well.... Screw you, bitch!

But seriously.... how can she be taken seriously when I know how she got so badly screwed by her Research Guide who thought dancing monkeys with bananas in their assholes could get their PhD's before she could! Ah well....

I've begun to realize just what a small place my Department is. I met with a friend who's escaped (read graduated) from the Department last year and is now in a better place (I shall not mention where), who's told me how much credentials these bozos hold outside the department. And in a way it makes sense! No professor worth their pinch of salt would actually lord over their students in such an ostentatious manner unless they were worth shit outside their petty realm!

And to this hoard, add a professor who made his research student a scapegoat for a research paper he stole word by word out of a poor bloke from Stanford and how he asks us not to plagiarize for our seminars! BWAHAHAHAHA! Oh! And another bloke who bought his research student her PhD and just made her sit there... probably being his secretary for six friggin' long years!

Aaaaaand the head of them all who's a pretty nice guy underneath... but well... you know.... you just can't like him! He's as enjoyable as that boil you got on your hiney the last time you went out for a sunbath!

And these asstards expect us to take them seriously.... Surely you must jest, Dr. what's-his-face!

But having said all of this, I must say there are still a handful of faculty left in my department who still hold some amount of respect in my sight. It just pains me to see those few good and worthy souls trapped in the middle of this circus!

To add to this pandemonium, I have a bunch of total Dickheads for classmates (except a few genuinely nice people!)... wait... they can't be dickheads... that would make them sensitive! Nope... they are more like the feces that leaves your asshole when you're constipated! Yep.... that's more like them! They'll smile at you and smile at you and smile at you while they think of a way to hack your guts open so they can be done with you. Now, I don't say that everybody should like me and treat me gently.... Heck, hate me? Be my guest, fella! But please.... have the balls to do it to my face! I wasn't born yesterday and all that synthetic smile's making your butt ugly face look botoxed!

And if some of those idiots think that hogging the system just so I can't code and will have to face the 'wrath of Dr. Kappochino' again... get a life! How hard is it to source the software out and load it in my PC... in my room.... where I can code while listening to LP..... singing out loud.... without having to worry about when the HOD (a.k.a. the boil in the butt) would drop in and literally punch my headlights in for singing in the Lab? Now.... the same people, who boast on being the class-toppers (give them the Telephone Directory and they'll tell it back to you in an hour... extension codes and all! Just the thing needed for creative research!) don't know what 1 mole of a substance is!

Psssst: Dr. Kappochino hopes to get us screwed for not completing MATLAB on time! I think I wet myself from laughing too hard!

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